this wasn't in the plan |but life is still pretty good

Not last Fall, but the Fall before, I planted some mums that did not last through the winter. This past Fall, I planted some more and was determined to keep them alive over the winter. They died, I cut them back and continued to water the dead-looking plants occasionally through the winter months. I was so excited to see some green on the plants earlier this month. My efforts, though they sometimes seemed like a waste, paid off.  That's a concept that carries over to so many other things.  The small things matter and they can add up to something bigger.

I'm coming upon the home stretch in this pregnancy, just ten more weeks to go!  It's time for me to start getting things together and see what needs to be purchased.  This would be a good time for me to write a list of frugal baby purchases, or the like, but I am not going to.

the internet is full of such lists.  The "must-haves" and the "don't buys" and honestly, those lists annoy me to no end.  There's seems to be a bit of preachiness to many of them, as if they proclaim the gospel truth when it comes to baby paraphenelia. I think that too many people trust these lists a bit too much, and as a result, end up with things that they really don't end up needing or miss out on great products that could have proven helpful! I'll never forget reading in a magazine that those little cloth bibs for babies were a waste and thinking how they proved so useful for us. Bug was a spitter, and it was so easy to just change the bib when he would spit up as opposed to the whole outfit.

It's been my experience that, aside from the obvious basics (car seat, clothing, place to sleep, diapers, bottles and formula if you choose to formula feed), figuring out what "extras" you need is complete trial and error and depends on each baby and your circumstances at the time.  Not what a new mom wants to hear, I know!

When Bug was six weeks old, we moved across the country.  Not wanting to move a lot of stuff, we didn't buy any big things for him until after the move, including a swing.  In fact, we never even bought a swing.  A swing is probably pretty high up on the "must have" lists, and we managed quite easily without one. Bug just seemed to be able to be soothed by other methods, so we never felt the need to spend our money on one. When Monkey came around, we decided no on the swing because I was afraid that Bug would be a bit too agressive when it came to pushing his little brother.  Monkey loved the swing that a friend had, so it probably wouldn't have been a wasted purchase, but I just didn't feel like it fit with our current circumstances.

Another product that often pops up on both lists is the Diaper Genie, or similar product. When Bug was a baby, we had one and loved it.  It meant we didn't need to trek outside of our apartment (often in the snow and cold) to toss out the smelly diapers.  Now, that we live in a house with our own trash bin in our own garage, the diaper pail just collects dust in a closet because it's easy to just throw them in the outside trash. 

In the swing example, it was trial and error that helped us out.  We didn't get one before he was born, and as time went on, it was evident that we didn't need one.  In the diaper pail example, we did get something that is often on the "skip this" lists, and for one baby (because of our circumstances) we found it extremely helpful. 

My advice to any new mom would be to carefully consider all the products out there and, while all the lists can serve as a guide, if you don't think you need an item you see on every "must have" list, don't buy it.  Likewise, if there's an item that's plastered all over every "you don't need this" list, but you think you do need it, buy it!  And remember that the stores will still be open after baby is born, and should you decide you do need something you skipped out on, you can purchase it later!

I apologize to those looking for an answer, because I don't have one!

The Tall One wants to surprise me for Mother's Day.  This surprise apparently costs more money than he might normally spend on a gift for me.  He needed to pay for it with cash, and in an effort to completely keep it a surprise, he would have liked to be able to pull the money without me noticing.  Not an easy task, since I'm the one who pays the bills! So, first off, I'd know something was up once I saw the money was gone, and second, I might get mad at him for spending it (but according to him, it wouldn't matter because, come Mother's Day, I'd love the surprise and I wouldn't care how much it cost).

Needless to say, the surprise would be a much more fun surprise if I had no idea it was coming, but since I keep track of the accounts, there's no way that could happen! Separate accounts could prevent this (to some extent) in the future.  Right now, it's not something that I think would work well, but maybe down the road.

I'm not angry at him for spending the money, though I was a bit at first. I decided that he knows our bottom line as well as I do and our financial goals are aligned.  So, if this is something he wants to do for me, then who am I to stop him?

Last month, I wrote about an idea to actually "save" money now that gas is half the price it was less than a year ago. Essentially, I'd pretend that gas cost $4 a gallon and physically save the difference.  I decided to just calculate the difference and then immediately transfer that amount from our ING checking account to one of our savings accounts.  On our budget spreadsheet, I write down what the cost would have been if gas cost $4, that way it's like the entire amount was spent on gas.

So far, that means almost an extra $100 in our pockets.  One could argue that we'd still have that amount regardless, but accounting for it in this way ensures that it really is saved and not just absorbed elsewhere.  Basically, it's a sneaky way of paying ourselves first.

Has anyone else started doing this?  I'd love to hear your update!

I apologize for my erratic posting lately.  I'm trying to work out a posting schedule that fits with my other obligations, and clearly I haven't come up with one yet!

CSA stands for Community Supported Agriculture.  Essentially, though each one probably varies, when you sign up with a CSA farm or club you are purchasing a share of what one local farm (or several) produces.  I love the idea of receiving a random box of produce each week (or every other week).  What a great way to try new fruits and vegetables, support local farmers, and enjoy fresh produce.

I've found two potential ones. One is year-round and the other is seasonal.  The first one allows you commit to either four weeks or eight weeks at a time and you can choose to receive a basket once a week or every other week.  The flexibility is a definite plus.  Joining the seasonal CSA requires you to commit to the entire growing season (from late spring to early fall)  and since we already grow more zucchini than we can eat or give away,  there would be a few weeks in the summer when we wouldn't need more produce!

But the price is definitely a factor.  The seasonal one is a bit cheaper, but both would mean upping our grocery budget because we'd be paying about twice as much as we're currently paying for produce.  The Tall One and I really haven't discussed it much past the "wouldn't it be cool?" stage,  so we probably won't be joining in anytime soon.  It's still something that I'll keep on the back burner though.

Want to find a CSA in your community?  Try this website, or just google "community supported agriculture [your state or city]".

Do you have any experience with a CSA farm?

Yesterday, I wanted to hit up a large yard sale and then maybe some other errands while Bug was at a birthday party. But those plans changed, and we ended up spending the day at home. While I was sad to miss the chance to spend time with just The Tall One and Monkey, I also probably missed the chance to spend some money - which is ultimately probably a good thing!

Here are some links I've enjoyed, some are from the beginning of the month since it's been awhile since I last shared links:

Turning Your Spending Report into a Budget

Are You Teaching Frugality or Just Being Broke?

How to Properly Save Your Service Discount

Finding Balance: Creating Space for Solitude

Never Pay for Small Storage Containers Again

Delayed Gratification: A Hard Lesson for my Teenage Son

A Frugal Diet, or a Frugal Lifestyle

There seems to be a lot of mention of Dave Ramsey in the personal finance blogosphere. The Tall One and I first learned of Dave Ramsey from a friend four or so years ago. The friend gave us a set of CDs to listen to, but never did. We were re-introduced two years ago when a co-worker suggested to TTO that we listen to what Dave had to say. This time we did and loved what we heard.


Dave Ramsey recommends taking control of your finances by following what he calls "baby steps". The baby steps are:

1. Set aside $1000 for an emergency fund.
2. Pay off all debt using a debt snowball.
3. Put aside enough money to cover 3-6 months of living expenses.
4. Invest for your retirement.
5. Save your children's college education.
6. Pay off home early.
7. Build wealth and give.

Following these baby steps weren't a huge shift for TTO and I. But listening to Dave Ramsey was quite inspiring. We don't follow the steps exactly, we've adjusted them to fit our own situation. Our emergency fund is more than $1000 and we built it up to where we wanted it while we paid off our non-mortgage debt. Once the emergency fund was in place, we were a bit more aggressive about paying off a car loan and some student loan debt, and those two things were quickly gone. We actually still have one student loan remaining, but the interest rate is lower than the interest rate on our savings account (though not for long!) so financially it makes sense to not pay it off right now. Currently, we're essentially working on step #3, though we have some other goals in mind as well. We are gradually upping our retirement savings right now too. Step #7 sounds wonderful and we can't wait to get there.

It's important to remember the "personal" in personal finance. There are a lot of ideas out there, so take what works for you and use it. Just keep in mind the "spend less than you earn" mindset, because really there is no arguing with that!

Glblguy at Gather Little by Little is asking for money saving tips.  Here's my contribution:

With the days getting warmer, I keep thinking it's about time for a trip to the zoo.  And then I remember that first I need to renew my zoo membership that expired at the end of last month! 

It may seem a bit counter-productive to spend a chunk of money in an effort to save some, but I think that in the long run purchasing a membership to a local zoo or museum can be a great money saver.  Assuming your family likes to go out and visit such places of course.

Chances are that after just a few visits, your membership will be paid for.  The remaining visits can be considered freebies.  Or, think of it this way, if you go once a month, you'll probably be paying about $2 per person per visit - that's a pretty inexpensive outing!  I love that I never feel like we have to get our money's worth out of each visit.  Having young kids who are fickle about how long they want to spend somewhere, I'd hate to pay full price and then have them be bored after 30 minutes. 

The Tall One and I had a zoo membership when we were first married and before we had kids.  When we were bored and needed something to do, a visit to the zoo was much cheaper than dinner out or a trip to the mall.  Because I'm sure if we hadn't bought the membership those zoo trips would have been replaced with excursions that would have involved spending a lot more than the initial $40 or so that our couple membership cost.

Another fun perk is the reciprocal program that often goes along with a membership.  This means you get free or discounted admission to other zoos or museums. 

If you aren't already, I encourage you to look into becoming a member at your local zoo, aquarium, or museum.

When it comes to grocery shopping and meal planning, I normally make a dinner menu (to some extent using what's on sale at the store as a guide) and then create a shopping list from that. This week I decided to try something different. I could claim it's a result of wanting to use up what we do have, but really it's due to laziness.

After making a list of what we needed to fill the refrigerator after being gone for a week, I had no desire to make a menu. So I just bought the basics that we were lacking and created a menu after the fact. Or, in reality, thought up a few dinner meals in my head (why does pregnancy have to make meal planning so difficult?). Then I checked our budget for the previous month. Oh wow, I spent a lot at the grocery store. There certainly must be a lot of food around this house somewhere.

So now I've decided that focusing on what is already in our pantry and freezer would be a great way to save some money in March and offset February's grocery shopping spree a bit. This month, I'd like to concentrate on keeping "the basics" on hand (we're decently stocked now). Will it save money? I don't know. I also want to add some basics to my repertoire. It seems that all too often I see a new recipe that I want to try and don't have one or more of the ingredients it calls for. At which point I think, why don't I have that, I should keep it on hand!

I realize it's different for everyone, but what are some of your staples, or basics, that you almost always have on hand?

I couldn't have planned the past two weeks no matter how hard I could have tried. Just four days before departure, I learned that the kids and I would be able to accompany The Tall One on his business trip. We'd be gone for nearly a week, a week that I'd originally intended to be at home. This meant some scrambling to finish work on a few prior commitments (that would need to be completed earlier than planned) as well as prepare for the trip.

And then the weather got in the way. Too many cancellations and delays and I was thinking that the trip just wasn't going to happen. But it did, and it was wonderful. And here are a few things I've learned.

Procrastination is bad, but if you stay on top of enough things, you'll have time to do the things you've put off.

While finding a pay phone is normally like looking for a needle in a haystack, pay phones are plentiful in airports.

While "on time" is preferred, "delayed" is much better than canceled.

It's possible to be very worried and stressed yet still feel completely calm. Don't ask me to elaborate, it's very technical.

Playing strange games that your four year old invents are actually kind of fun while waiting in an airport (and airports will somehow cause said four year old to walk approximately six times slower than his normal pace).

Even if things seem to be going horribly wrong, the tide can turn and everything can end up perfectly.

Here's something I whipped up for sons to (hopefully!) enjoy on the plane. They have a magnet playset that they really enjoy, but I wasn't too keen on taking it with us because I didn't want to loose any of the pieces. So I made my own.


Originally, these were 8.5 x 11 sheets of magnet that I covered with cardstock and then cut into quarter sheets for a project. I had several left over and they've just been sitting around waiting for another project. I kept some of them intact and cut shapes from the other ones. Ideally, I'd want them bigger, but you can't complain too much when you use what you have on hand and nothing more!